What is Munbonding?

Written by Mel and Lav

Table of Contents

Where it All Began

Around 1998, Amanda Flowers, a member of the Just for Writers group mailing list, coined the term SoulBonding (after the game title "SoulBlazer"). The writers and roleplayers in this group were experiencing characters, both those of their own creation and those of their favorite fandoms (particularly Final Fantasy), "coming to life" in their heads. Usually, they appeared to tell the writers/roleplayers how their story should go, but over time, many of these creatives developed relationships with their soulbonds outside of their stories as well, all of them living together in their "soulscapes".

Eventually, the soulbonding community made the jump to LiveJournal, a web diary site that was popular in the early 2000s. It was here that it gained a bit of nortoriety, both positive and negative, outside of the writing and roleplaying circles it began in. The multiplicity community at the time took notice, and after initial scorn and mockery, the two communities began mixing together and exchanging cultures. As this group began to merge, along with some of them changing their theories on what they were experiencing, soulbonders began dropping the label due to the connotations the community had gained for being "too yaoi fannish", "too childish", "too writer-focused", "not writer-focused enough", "too spiritual", "too psychological", "too anti-plural", "too plural-accepting", and more. By the late 2000s to early-2010s, much of the soulbonding community had seen its heyday come to an end.

Nowadays, many people who might have called themselves soulbonders in the past now find themselves in the general plurality, [western] tulpamancy, yume/selfshipping, or occult/spiritwork circles, or even without any community at all. There are still a few remaining soulbonders left, posting here and there, trying to keep the community alive, but it is mainly seen as a metaphysical experience now. Little space exists in modern-day soulbonding for the writers, roleplayers, and fans of fiction that used to be deeply tied to the culture of the original soulbonders. Which brings us to our next point:

Concerning Modern-Day Soulbonding

As previously mentioned, the modern soulbonding community has become more focused on metaphysical and spiritual interpretations of how soulbonding works. People like us who see it more from a psychological perspective have found it challenging to engage in conversations or find folks to relate to in the community. We've seen this echoed from others we've met—those who kind of like the concept of soulbonding but are hesitant to fully embrace it due to its spiritual associations, despite those spiritual associations not being an inherent part of soulbonding's original framework but rather it being revised over time as some people promoted their own interpretation as the sole "correct" one.

For some time, we have tried to find soulbonders who were like us, or at least to foster more recognition and acceptance of our views. However, it has been…difficult. Some metaphysical soulbonders have implied our psychological perspective makes our soulbonds less real than their "real soulbonds". Additionally, sharing our experiences has sometimes lead to feelings of distress and doubt among other soulbonders simply by it being different from theirs. It's exhausting seeing psychological soulbonders continually left out, overlooked, and dismissed. We've even felt compelled to present our thoughts with numerous caveats to avoid upsetting anyone, and when we haven't, we've faced scrutiny about our ethics, our methods, and our expertise.

We genuinely respect and value the perspective of metaphysical/spiritual soulbonders—they are our friends and peers, and their views are just as significant as ours. Yet the consistent tendency to revise the narrative around soulbonding and the lack of inclusivity can be frustrating. So, after 8 years of striving for recognition, we came up with a new plan for going forward: make our own term and subcommunity.

What Does Munbonding Entail?

A Simplified Definition

Munbonding (pronounced "MOON-bonding"), from the Middle English word "münde" meaning "mind" as well as the slang term "Mun" used in roleplaying circles.

A strictly psychological phenomenon where a person (the munbonder) finds they're able to sense and interact with an autonomous version of a fictional character (the munbond) in their mind, establishing a mutually agreed upon relationship or "bond" with them. This living character—formed and powered by the subconscious mind—and their connection to their munbonder often stems from the bonder's emotional investment in said character, which is typically cultivated by engaging with their source media, writing, roleplaying, or other imaginings. The relationship can occur spontaneously or be deliberately initiated by the munbonder.

Psychological Lens

Munbonding as a framework hinges on the idea that a munbond originates from a bonder's own mind and creative energy rather than being a metaphysical channeling or spiritual practice. While it is true that a bond can live "somewhere else" beyond a bonder's mental headspace and may possess qualities, memories, or aspects that can surprise their bonder upon discovery (implying a source beyond their conscious thoughts), it remains fundamentally powered by the bonder and their understanding of their bond. The term munbond was not introduced for soulbonders to distinguish their psychological-based entities from their spiritual ones, but instead to serve as a model through which to fully comprehend this unique experience. The munbonding community is here to provide a dedicated space for individuals who don't resonate with metaphysical perspectives regarding this kind of connection, enabling them to discuss and share the life they have with their bonds all from a psychological lens.

Honoring Soulbonding's Roots

By Lav's research into what remaining articles are left from the OG days of soulbonding, it seems to have been coined to describe an experience had by many writers for centuries called "the living character phemenon" (LCP) or, as one study put it, "The Illusion of Indepedent Agency". Though the original definition made no particular interpretation of how soulbonding worked, some had regrets that it came across as so spiritual-sounding. Over time, the writing, roleplaying, and creative aspect of soulbonding fell away as metaphysical understandings took over (as described at the start of this article). Munbonding as a term and a community intends to return the focus back to the creativity-fueled experience so that those of us following in the footsteps of our forebears have a place to belong again.

Stories, Imagination, and Fiction

The connection to a munbond is strengthened through engaging with their story, whether it be your own or someone else's. Writing, roleplaying, and intuiting (an essay on this will be forthcoming!) are all common ways to discover details about a munbond's life, personality, preferences, and more, beyond what they came pre-established with. As beings powered by the creative subconscious, they flourish when they are engaged with in this way (directly or indirectly), allowing them to become even more vibrant and fully fleshed out people indepedent from their bonder.

Additionally, the world(s) bond(s) live in are generally under the influence of the bonder and often the bond as well, collaborative style. It can be exactly like the one from their source, an amalgamation of several sources, or something entirely new; it depends on what home is fitting for a person's bond(s) and what everyone involved agrees on. This world will be a living world, just like bonds are living characters, and a bonder and their bond(s) can discover the depths of it together.

Deep Emotional Investment

To be a bonder requires you to care about a character in some way, shape, or form. You can find them interesting or intriguing; find kinship or relatability with them; crave partnership, friendship, or family with them; hate them or find them annoying; or something else, but it is very hard to connect to a person—especially one within your mind—if you feel nothing for them at all. We like to call this "bond feels", basically feeling incredibly drawn to a fictional character within their story. While not the only indicator of a good munbonding match, "bond feels" are the perfect kindling to light a possible connection ablaze.

When a bonder and bond interact for the first time (whether because they spontaneously showed up or they were sought out) this initial emotional attachment pre-bonding may be surprising to both parties, as it can create a sense of intimacy greater than the actual familiarity shared between them. However, it's actually incredibly normal to experience, just be mindful of boundaries and comfort.

An Active Relationship and Connection

While a person who munbonds is called a "munbonder" and a munbonded being is called a "munbond", munbonding at its root is an active relationship rather than an identity or state of being. It involves communication, understanding, negotiation, spending time together, resolving conflicts, mutual support and encouragement, and more. A living character has to agree to be your munbond for them to be one. In the case of spontaneous ones, this agreement may be assumed in lieu of a full-on conversation, but no living character is forced to be your munbond simply because you can interact with them. It's even possible to know and interact with living characters you are not bonded with on a regular basis. Agreeing to be munbonded should be treated as something sincere and meaningful; munbonds should never be discarded flippantly or ignored. Going without direct interaction for long stints is fine—bonds will often have their own lives or in-world relationships—but forgetting them altogether isn't what munbonding is about.

Many Roads

There's a few places munbonds can come from, such as…

  • Your own original story (This would be called an in-sourced munbond)
  • Roleplaying a character
  • Movies (a munbond from a piece of media is an out-sourced munbond)
  • Shows
  • Books
  • Video Games
  • Podcasts/Audio Dramas
  • Art
  • Music
  • Immersive Daydreaming
  • A dream you had in your sleep

And probably others we're forgetting to mention! There's no wrong or ridiculous source a munbond can come from; what matters is the connection the bonder feels for them and the bond responding back. Also, as mentioned, some can show up spontaneously, and others you may seek out a connection with.

How does Munbonding Work? (Theory)

So finally, the important question: how does munbonding, as a psychological phemenon, actually work? Here's how Lav has come to explain it:
You know how sometimes you get to know a friend so well that you can just predict how they'll react to something or whether they’ll love or hate a particular item? And then when you show it to them later, they respond exactly how you expected? Well, it’s kind of the same deal with munbonding. When you really know a character—their backstory, their quirks, what they enjoy or can't stand, all those little things that define them—you might find yourself thinking, "Character A probably went through this at some point" or "Character A would totally be into this!" Or you might read a post and then go "Ohmygoodness, that fits Character A perfectly, I just know it!" That's the basic foundation behind munbonding: The Knowing. If you keep exercising The Knowing, eventually, you can change it to a question and give space for the bond to answer instead. When you know them inside and out, your subconscious mind can just supply the answers automatically, making it a fast, effortless process without you needing to think about it. It is them, fully them, not you-in-a-different-voice, because it has the essence of who they are at the root. Talk to them, and they will let you know that they are themselves—usually with strong vehemence, in my experience. 😅

In Conclusion

We hope this has given you a clearer picture of what munbonding is all about and what we envision the community's experiences to include! Feel free to put questions or remarks in the comments below, and we'll do our best to answer them directly or in future essays.

Last Updated:3/05/2025

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